And another thing....

Ring ring....ring ring

Me: "West Kent Campaign HQ, how can I help you....?"

Angry caller: "You're wholly inefficient in that office in my opinion."

"Good morning to you too - what can I do to help"

"There's an example, you haven't even asked whose calling."

"Well, normally callers introduce themselves before launching into an attack, but if you tell me who you are and what we have done, I might be able to assist."

"It's (name) - I would have thought you'd recognise my voice. I have after all been a member 47 years. I sent me membership subscription last week and you have not had the courtesy to acknowledge receipt."

"OK, thank you for explaining. We send membership cards out every two weeks, so if you paid last week you will receive your card and acknowledgement around mid June."

"Precisely - wholly inefficient. In the old days membership cards were posted immediately. It was much more efficient then."

"Do you mean when the Association lost around £8,000 pa from reserves..."

"Quite. As I said, it was much more efficient then. And another thing - the poster you put up in my garden, no-one liked (name of MP) photograph. He looked supercilious. The photograph he used last time was so much better. "

"It was the same photograph - he had new ones taken, but everyone agreed the old one was better so we used the 2010 photograph again."

This inconvenient fact took the wind out of her sails - but it only took her seconds to recover...

"In that case it must have been the poor quality printing. Goodbye."